Here’s an interesting email that landed in some Lulu’ers box last night.  If you were having trouble finding your book in Lulu’s Search Option, apparently they were under attack by Gremlins but have now got it all sorted out.  I have no idea what the 25% off at the top means, when they later say they’ll be sending you a 15% off special in a few days.  Oh, and is it just me or does Lulu suggest you forward the special email to a bunch of people who drink.  Why not nurse maids, dog groomers, and trash collectors? Just saying.

(Your Book’s Title)

Take 25% off

You recently published (title of book) and made it available to the world in the Lulu Marketplace. Thank you. We’re thrilled to have such a remarkable work in our catalog!

Unfortunately, the world didn’t get to see it as quickly as they should have. A hiccup in our system kept your book from showing up in search results immediately after you published.

The short of it is the gremlins got us. Fortunately, we found them – big, hairy devils with beady red eyes and the complexion of toad – and dispensed with them. (We’ll spare you the details). Our systems are back to the Lulu standard and all books in our catalog now appear in our search results.

We want to give you a new start on your sales. In the next few days, you’ll receive a custom e-mail from us that will display your book’s cover and a 15% discount on the list price. We’ll design the e-mail so that you can easily forward it to friends, family, colleagues, neighbors, coffee shop baristas, waiters, bartenders and anyone else you meet. It’ll be a handy way to encourage them to buy your book. And don’t worry – that 15% discount will come out of our profit, not yours. We just want to make things right.

Thank you again for choosing Lulu.

Sincerely,

Your Friends at Lulu

I’ve had the pleasure of reviewing several short story anthologies published through Lulu, and I have to say that Jeremy Boland’s collection is one of the best.  Not only are the stories fresh and original, but the physical book itself is an excellent example of a self-published author getting it right.  That’s why I’m going to talk about the book quality first.

The book itself is the first from Lulu I’ve seen in person in the 4.3 x 6.9 size.  While the $16.95 price tag may seem a bit high for this deluxe “pocket sized” book, I’d probably still buy it at full price off a bookstore shelf.  Jeremy’s original artwork on the cover is also fun and colorful, and a bit humorous after you read the stories and learn who these characters are.

Inside formatting is pretty much tight and clean, although all of the front matter has headers and page numbers.  The title page is page 1.  This is a sure sign of amateur, but I didn’t even notice it the first time I sat down to read the book. It’s a common mistake that only other people and authors in the industry would notice. The book still has a classic look and feel to it, almost graphic novel-like. Jeremy’s website also echoes that look and I enjoyed taking a look around there after reading his book.

There are eleven short stories in the book.  The first, “Counting Sheep,” reminded me of something from an early Stephen King anthology like Skeleton Crew. A man is counting sheep to try to fall back asleep and this is timed with an intruder breaking into his house to kill him.

This is followed by another odd tale about a werewolf hunter meeting with his psychiatrist, a new twist on an old genre that has unfortunately been shadowed by all the recent vampire phenomenon. Speaking of classics, Jeremy also treats us to a flesh eating zombie attack paralleled to a strange love story.  And better yet, he’s included a spaceship/alien tale as well.

Science fiction, murder and mystery, horror and gore, there’s a bit of everything here for people who love the genre and prefer to read short stories.  Jeremy’s style is also very simplistic.  There’s not a lot of connection to be made with his characters, but sometimes that’s okay.  After all, they are short stories.  His may lack a certain depth, but I can appreciate that from time to time when I just want to be entertained and don’t expect to be thinking of the characters long after the last page. The only thing I would have liked even better is a few illustrations to really round out that graphic novel feel I got here.  Here’s a bit from the end of “Truckstop Unicorn”…

Was I fighting myself?  Was she fighting herself?  I don’t know the answer to that, I just know that I won. I’m here and she’s not. all that’s left is a sane man stuck in a crazy bitch’s body and all he wants is his life back.

It doesn’t even matter if it’s real or not. It doesn’t matter that life started out for me as some crazy fan’s fantasy, that I was only modeled after what she knew of you. All I want is to be back in my house, here. To go back to being the reclusive writer I remember being.

Overall, I found this to be a fun book that’s definitely worth checking out.  I love the look, it’s sassy title, and the feel of the book itself, and I enjoyed the stories inside as well. Mr. Boland has written and published a work that’s new and fresh to the genre, and worth a read! Check it out…

Visit the author online!

Read a preview of the book!

I was excited to get my copy of Altered Life, a detective thriller from Keith Dixon. He was nice enough to send me a copy all the way across the pond and I dove into it the same day it arrived. The description on the Lulu page hooked me: ‘Altered Life transplants the attitude and pace of the American private eye story into a contemporary English setting.’

This book features Sam Dyke, a hard edged private eye with a past. His niche tends more towards stakeouts and connecting the dots than the intricacies of corporate espionage. However, the murder of Rory Brand, consultant and computer tycoon, sends him lurching off on a case he didn’t want trying to find one killer out of a dozen likely suspects.

Each chapter seems to start with a paragraph or two which give you a glimpse at the English locations where Altered Life is set. Here is an example from Chapter 46: “The next morning I drove down to north Birmingham, to one of the suburbs that were built as wealthy Victorian merchants began to distance themselves from the dark heart of their steel foundries and sought the green pastures of what was then open country. The wide roads and spacious architecture of mansion and church had since been overrun by the mini-community of Chinese takeaway, Laundromat and video store but if you half-shut your eyes you could still see the outlines of the Palladian refuges that the bearded philanthropists had created for themselves and the families.”

There are strong female characters sprinkled throughout Altered Life as well. Laura Marshall is the up and coming executive at Brand’s firm that hires Sam to solve Brand’s murder. Tara Brand is Rory’s current wife who shares a connection to Sam Dyke as well. Of course, there is a police detective with a bad attitude about Private Eyes who end up in the middle of his case.

The action comes fast and furious as Sam starts stepping on toes and asking uncomfortable questions. The important aspects of detective stories are here, the ubiquitous car chase that ends up with Sam in the ditch and Laura in the hospital… the excusable breaking an entering to dig up valuable clues, and the switcheroo at the end which you don’t quite see coming even though you should. The writing is sound, the story flows well, and the frequent dialogue between characters is expertly handled. Perhaps surprising for a book like this is the time spent fleshing out the characters and examining what makes them tick.  Even Sam seems more like you and I trying to solve this case than a super-detective.

If you like private eye stories, you owe it to yourself to check out Keith Dixon’s Altered Life. I had a hard time putting it down and I bet you will too. With this book you’ll be in on the ground floor of what is sure to be a successful series of ‘Sam Dyke’ mysteries.

Hi all, when comparing apples to oranges to limes, one must make color and texture adjustments for the differences in fruit. I have more experience with Createspace than with either Lulu or Lightning Source but have reviewed price specifications for print-on-demand contracts from Lightning Source, so I can tell you a bit about those costs. For the purpose of this discussion I will reference only print-on-demand services because I assume most people considering Lulu or Createspace are not planning on having thousands of books printed for warehousing purposes.

1. POD PER-BOOK COST. Createspace does small print runs via print-on-demand. They do not do offset printing for mass-market volume discounts. Lulu may offer discounts on volume, but I don’t know for sure. Lightning Source offers both POD and offset printing. For POD, the cost per book is virtually the same as the cost for producing the same book on CreateSpace under the PRO plan. Lightning Source does offer graduated discounts on bulk POD print runs, starting at 5% for 50 books. Last time I checked on Lulu three months ago, the per-book production price was consistently higher for the same product under any plan than the cost would be from either Createspace or Lightning Source.

2. TITLE SETUP. Createspace charges nothing for you to set up your title and provides an ISBN for free, but that ISBN marks them as the publisher, not you. With their PRO plan you can cut your per-book cost by about 1/3 by paying $39 upfront and annually thereafter to keep the book in print. Without the pro plan the book remains in print for free. You can provide your own ISBN under either plan with no extra charge and no discount. Lulu has a similar program and a distribution program that costs $99 or more the last time I checked. Lightning Source charges $37.50 for cover file setup and $37.50 for text (book interior) file setup, for a total setup fee of $75 for a book digitally uploaded for production. You provide your own ISBN. Also LS charges $12 annually to keep your book available. By far Createspace is the cheapest route to produce a book when considering startup cost.

3. PROOF & REVISION COST. Createspace charges the per-book production cost plus S&H to send a proof. Additional proofs after changes are the same cost. There are no revision or file replacement charges. Generally speaking a proof for a 300-page book would be around $12 or $13 including S&H. I don’t know what it would be on Lulu. On Lightning Source a proof copy is $30 including Express mailing cost. LS charges a whopping $40 per file upload, meaning if you make changes to your cover and upload a revised file, they’ll charge you $40. If you also make changes to the text and upload, that’s an additional $40.

4. SHIPPING CHARGES. Createspace since January has appeared to offer more options for shipping. The first proof I ordered was via UPS and cost over $6.00. By the time I had my second title ready for proof, USPS media rate was available at $3.85. I don’t know if those choices are now consistently available, but they were the last time I ordered a proof. I don’t know what Lulu charges for shipping. Via Lightning Source, they say they charge the ‘going rate’ for mailings of the book itself to you as the publisher or to distributors, plus you will be charged $1.50 handling fee per book. For a box of 50 books, that would include $75 handling fee above the shipping rate.

5. DISTRIBUTION. The one HUGE drawback to Createspace is that distribution is only on Amazon. Lulu and Lightning Source offer distribution on Amazon plus other channels. The biggy for LS is the Ingram catalog. Note Lulu charges a fee for distribution but then has some exclusions so that maybe foreign rights are not included. LS distribution for UK is included only if you choose that POD contract in addition to the US POD contract (you have several options you can mix and match).

So, let’s look at comparative costs to get ONE book done without any revisions. For comparative book cost between Lightning Source and Createspace, I will use Createspace PRO plan and no pro plan. Because I am not dealing with Lulu right now I will leave it out of the comparison. Their prices are available online, so you can check them out yourself. Just be sure you use the same page count for your book when making comparisons.

LS
$75 file uploads
$30 proof
$12 Ingram catalog annually
$40 cost of your ISBN if purchased in block of 10
TOTAL $157 for a small paperback
Cost per 360-page book ($0.90 + $0.013/pg) $5.58 direct to distributor (slightly higher if direct to you the publisher)

CS
$13 proof
TOTAL $12 for a 360 page book
Cost per 360-page book ($1.50 + $0.02/pg) $8.70

CS-Pro
$39 Pro fee
$9.57 proof
TOTAL $48.57
Cost per 360-page book ($0.85 + $0.012/pg) $5.72

Comparing the three pricing structures you can see that distribution via Ingram’s catalog you will pay about $110-135 showing you as the publisher. Add your ISBN to CS and that lowers the difference to $70-95. NOTE that just because you have the opportunity to reach additional distribution sources through Lightning Source, there is no guarantee that anyone will buy your book if they don’t know about it. So MARKETING is your number-one priority at this juncture. Note also that generally POD books are non-returnable, and if you opt with LS to have them returned to you, they will charge you a fee per book as someone else already pointed out.

Clear as mud?

-Penumbra Publishing

I shared this with fellow reviewer LK and she pointed out the issue some might also have as far as your ISBN is concerned: “CS has that one huge downside being linked ONLY to Amazon, which is why I went with Lulu for Misfit McCabe.  Plus, they also have the other downside of owning the ISBN instead of you.”

So when you are choosing a direction for your book, ask yourself these questions?

1. Do you want to own your ISBN?
2. Do you care about getting your book into bookstores?
3. Do you want your book available through other channels than Amazon?
4. How much money are you willing to invest in the project up front?

For those that don’t know, the Amazon Marketplace is where Amazon allows third parties (you, me, or indie bookshops out there, anyone really) to sell “used” or “new” copies of a book right on the same product page where Amazon is selling it.  They received a lot of flak for it in the beginning because publishers couldn’t believe Amazon would allow used copies of books to be sold right along side brand new copies.  But Amazon didn’t care.

They practically stole the book business from Ebay because they allowed sellers to list books without charging them any fees, they let listings stay live for up to 60 days, and they don’t charge you a fee if the book doesn’t sell.  They make money by taking a commission when your book actually sells. Read more about my own Marketplace business adventure  in the POD Diary. Marketplace business now makes up about 45% of their total book sales per year.  It’s easy money for them too.  No stock. No shipping fees.  They just run the automated email and listing system and charge the credit cards when books sell!

So, back to Lulu.  Today I get the following email from them…

Dear Lulu Author,

Congratulations, your book has been selected for listing on Amazon.com’s Marketplace! As a result, your book will now be easily found on the world’s largest online bookseller. There will be some differences between your listing on Lulu and your listing on Amazon. Amazon charges a fee to list your book, and in order to cover that cost your book will be listed with a 30% markup; however your royalty will remain the same, and your book’s price on Lulu will not change. Furthermore, your book sales on Amazon will reflect in your Lulu account immediately. Lulu is committed to helping you increase your book’s sales and we hope you enjoy the benefits of listing your book on Amazon.com.

Kind regards,
Lulu

You are free to opt out of the program if you are not interested in the benefits associated with having your book listed on Amazon. To do so, please reply to this email with the Project ID of the book you wish removed.

Now, I have a few problems with this email.  First, they don’t even tell me which of my three books was chosen for Marketplace.  Second, they don’t even tell you what Marketplace is or how it works or what its advantages are.  Third, their going to mark the book up 30% but still only give me my same commission.

Let’s do some math!

My book, Stealing Wishes, lists for $14.oo.  I make a 67 cent commission from Amazon sales fulfilled through Lulu right now.  A 30% mark-up is $4.20 making their Marketplace listing $18.20.  So, I listed a copy of my book at this price just to see what Amazon’s commission would be.  It’s $5.07.  So, Amazon’s cut automatically eats up the $3.99 standard shipping credit leaving Lulu with a profit of $17.12.  If a buyer chooses expedited shipping, it’s $6.99.  That leaves Lulu with a sale of $20.12 (Only $1.92 leftover for shipping but they still make the full $18.20 they listed the book for).

So, after Lulu actually prints and ships the book and pays me 67 cents, their probably still making a few bucks at this if they generate any sales at all.  Buying direct from Lulu, they charge me $9.12 per copy of my own book (at no quantity discount) and their cheapest shipping method is $5.85 media mail, but you know this is marked up too.

And at an $18.20 listing before shipping, who is going to buy a copy from them anyway?  I currently have it listed myself for $11.50!  The only thing that would remotely make anyone consider buying it from LuluPress at $18.20 is their feedback rating.  Buyers are given the chance to rate their buying experience with a seller and leave a comment, and believe me, these ratings can make or break you.  I, myself, will not buy from a seller who has three stars or less no matter what the price.  LuluPress currently has a rating of 4 1/2 stars out of 5.  You can even check out their current rating and feedback they’ve received on their profile page.

My only guess about Lulu joining in this venture is that it is a sure fire way for them to go around the Booksurge umbrella Amazon put over them last year. They stand to  make better money doing it because Marketplace stock is printed from Lulu’s suppliers which means no Booksurge printing and shipping fees for Lulu.

In checking the current 3rd party Marketplace listings for Stealing Wishes, LuluPress is not listed at the time I’m writing this.  And I will not be opting out of the Marketplace program despite the lack of information given in the email blast.  But I do advise all authors to invest in copies of you book and list them yourselves in the Amazon Marketplace.  It’s free to list there! Beat the list price or Amazon sale price of the book, and in the comments section state that the seller is getting a “signed first edition direct from the author.”  The lower the price will get you closer to the top of the listings. And include a free bookmark or other “freebie” with each sale and maybe a nice thank you note.  Amazon Marketplace sales do affect your book’s Amazon ranking, so every sale counts!

Reviewed by Special Guest Reviewer: Linda Welch, author of Along Came a Demon

I did enjoy Marva Dasef’s charming Tales Of A Texas Boy, with its bonus insight into past events and lifestyles. Based on her father’s reminiscence, these appealing stories take us back to 1930s Texas during the Depression era when life was very different. Each tale begins with an explanatory paragraph and is embellished with wonderful old family photos appropriate to the story. Modeled on Dasef’s father, “Eddie” narrates with a touch of dialect so natural it was as if I could hear his voice inside my head:

It’d been raining forty days and forty nights is what Ma said, but I only counted up eleven days myself. She did tend to put things in Bible sayin’s, so I won’t say she was lyin’, just exaggeratin’ for effect.

Still, me and my sister, Dorothy, who we called Sister, had to go to school, whether the creek was high or dry. We’d spent Saturday and Sunday hopin’ the rain would at least slow down some, but it didn’t look like it was going to. On Monday, we put on our rain slickers and ran to the barn quick as we could to saddle the horses. Pa cut out oiled canvas to cover the saddles and most of the horse as well.

Tales Of A Texas Boy is crammed with memorable anecdotes; some amusing, some quirky, some sad as Eddie shares memories of his childhood and teen years. One tale is his father’s, who served in France with Black Jack Pershing during World War I; another is his mother’s as he thinks she would have told it. Another, “Frank Norfleet – Detective” is admittedly a tall tale.

“In “Rattlesnakes and Jackrabbits” Eddie goes with local men on a hunt to kill those two pests who were the bane of Texan farmers:

A big part of this expedition included moonshine. The hunters would head out in the early afternoon and start drinking right off. By dusk, most of ‘em couldn’t hit much of anything, but was havin’ a lotta fun anyways. The hardest part of the trip was avoidin’ being shot by someone else. Mostly, though, these men knew what they was doing even when they could hardly see straight. I was glad Pa wasn’t a drinker as I’d see how stupid the men would act. I guess that would be one more reason why I respected my Pa.

One of Eddie’s adventures, “The Cattle Drive”, begins when he rides to meet a small herd approaching the farm and is surprised by what he sees:

Yep, I’m here to tell ya and ya know I don’t lie. Every last animal in the herd was a bull. This puzzled me no end, as much as it puzzles you to hear it. Course, the herd was no more ‘n twenty Hereford bulls, but . . . well, I can’t think of what that would be. Mostly herds are made up of steers and cows. Bulls ain’t usually included as they cause troubles wantin’ at the cows and all.

And before long Eddie is on a cattle drive to New Mexico.

Go back in time to visit the County Fair and meet Dad Boles and his bear Sophie. Take a trip to an auction and come home with the biggest, meanest jackass you’ve ever seen. Collect old bones to sell to the bone buyers and meet James Ridgley Whiteman, who discovered Clovis Man. Meet the smartest chicken, the finest dog, a prizewinning sow and a couple of feuding twin brothers. Find the body of an elderly lady who died alone in her prairie home. Meet a desperate family displaced by the dust storms in Oklahoma.

One of my favorites is “Chance Encounter”: In 1937 Eddie and his football team, the Salem Wildcatters, were on their way to Dallas for the State Championship when they stopped at a diner for lunch. They could not help but notice a pretty blond-haired, blue-eyed woman in a fur wrap. In fact, Eddie says, “it was hard to see anybody but her in that booth.” Eddie is invited to sit with her and is embarrassed when she touches and flatters him. The other boys seem to know who she is, but not Eddie.

“Well now,” she said as she stood up. “I guess you all’d like to see some of the real me.” With that, she put her hand on her hip and kind of jutted it out.

With a whole different voice, she said “Come up and see me sometime, boys.” Then she sashayed out of the diner while I stood there with my mouth hangin’ open. I felt really stupid when I realized I hadn’t recognized Mae West.

I think Tales Of A Texas Boy by Marva Dasef will appeal to both children and adults. In fact, the large print is particularly suited for children and senior citizens whose eyesight is perhaps not as good as it once was. Marva Dasef skillfully brings her colorful characters to life, “a different life than any of us will ever know”, and I could have happily read another one hundred pages and another twenty Tales Of A Texas Boy. I’ll just have to read it all over again. And again.

I first came across the writings of Paul Ciccone Jr. last year when I read and reviewed his book, OH Brother.  That review went on to become our top review of 2008 and Paul’s book was probably the most talked about.  Like Mick Rooney, Paul’s writing definitely commands your full attention and is one that you will want to take time to read and mull over, rather than rush through it.

I knew his next book, The Old Man of Naukeag, would be just as good.  And indeed it is, if not better.  Paul writes in a style that’s hard to describe and unlike anything the traditional market could ever bring you. If anyone ever needed a prime example of a polished self-published book and an author that isn’t afraid to take chances, then they should invest in a copy of either of Paul’s books.

I enjoy Paul’s writing because no matter what story he’s telling, there’s always some word gem hidden within the root of his theme that’s completely left up to the reader’s interpretation, phrases I’d find myself underlining or highlighting if I was reading a physical copy.  Here’s one from the preface of the book that I’ve read over and over again and almost committed to memory:

We, each and every one of us, is purposed ultimately the same: to be born, to grow, to develop, to expand, to recreate, then finally to pass on—and all for one explicit reason, to express the potentialities within ourselves to the utmost of our ability…nothing more, nothing less.

Paul’s words of wisdom aren’t anything new or anything you probably haven’t heard before, but his stories build upon such matter-of-fact advice and the author just crafts it in such a way that you can’t help but take notice.  It’s a nice mix of wisdom and advice that radiates with Paul’s love of both words and life.  The book itself is a collection of short stories that reminds me of sitting down with an elder to hear tales of yesterday.  Drawn from personal experiences, each story offers the reader a taste of a certain place and time one might not have experienced, along with that feeling of home and warmth that each of us draws from some place or time that is special to us in our own way.

“Naukeag’s Old Man,” the first short story, embraces location: Ashburnham, Massachusetts and a lakehouse with a view.  The author takes you on a journey, almost like a hike through the country, describing each tree and mountain almost poetically.  I love the way the author concentrates on each minute detail, giving his setting not just the importance it deserves in regards to its inhabitants, but also the personal touch of why it’s important to him.  The setting and place of our lives shapes us, and Paul just reminds us to slow down from time to time and take note of it.  Commit a leaf to memory or a sound.  Focus on the seasons and how they change where we are.  In a chapter about embracing the past, Paul reminds us those changes are inevitable, and we must adapt to the times and to our settings:

I wonder, is it really all that much different this time around, than it was last? I’m not so sure it is and I’m not so sure that it will be much different for the generations to come. In order to have any peace of mind in the numerous matters I cannot control, I found it necessary to accept a very different outlook on life than I had thirty years earlier. These days I take comfort in knowing that I am a better person than I thought myself to be…accepting whatever mistakes I made as contributing to personal growth. I know too, that living in this society means I have to learn to cope with the difficulties and conform to its methods (even when it hurts).

Paul rounds out the book with a collection of works based primarily on family and written by family called “Tutt’s Tales.”  There’s a letter to Ma and a few memories of Pa.  Paul himself shares a story about his fondness for an old tree.  It reminded me of some of the trees I used to climb where I grew up.  There’s a poem about the rain from Maria.   And one story that really stuck out at me is called “The Memoirs of a Seven Year Old.”  It’s an odd title in that we wouldn’t think a child at that age would have much to write about and call it their memoirs, but listening to a child’s memories through their eyes might just astound you:

I find a piece of white paper in Daddy’s glove compartment. The paper is folded in half. I unfold it and I read it. It is a poem that Daddy wrote. I never read one of Daddy’s poems, only this one. He wrote in black ink. I read it while Daddy is not in the car, but then I fold it back up and put it back where I found it. When Daddy gets back in the truck we drive home. I don’t think he knows that I read the poem on the folded paper. I wonder if he knows that he has a poem in his glove compartment.

Once again, Paul Ciccone, Jr. impresses us with a book that’s like spending time looking through an old photo album.  We are given the opportunity to remember things we forgot.  We are able to look at others, and at ourselves. and observe how we have changed.  And our heart is given the chance to revisit the past…a place and a time of yesterday that each of us holds dear in some way.

]]> http://llbookreview.com/2009/05/review-78-the-old-man-of-naukeag-by-paul-ciccone-jr/feed/ 7 http://llbookreview.com/2009/05/review-77-hannah-and-the-magic-blanket-by-barry-nye/ http://llbookreview.com/2009/05/review-77-hannah-and-the-magic-blanket-by-barry-nye/#comments Tue, 05 May 2009 11:00:05 +0000 LK Gardner-Griffie http://lulubookreview.com/?p=1226 Hannah and the Magic Blanket
Land of the Dinosaurs
Written by Barry Nye
Illustrated by Sheila Keck
Copyright © 2008
$18.50 Paperback
40 pages – full color
ISBN: 9780557036820

Hannah And The Magic Blanket – Land of the Dinosaurs represents Barry Nye’s debut children’s story. Inspired by the imagination of his granddaughter, Hannah, Nye brings her imagination to life in this first of a series books about Hannah and her magic blanket. We meet Hannah as a spunky preschooler, who is preoccupied with playing dinosaurs and whose favorite toy is a purple dinosaur. After a hard morning at play, Hannah lays down on the couch for a nap snuggling with her pink blanket and purple dinosaur. The next thing she knows, she is in an unknown land and Mommy is nowhere to be found. Hannah’s spunky spirit takes her exploring and she soon runs across a purple dinosaur, just like her favorite toy at home. The dinosaur is very unhappy because she has a stone stuck between her toes. Hannah helps the dinosaur, whom she names Lulu, with the stone and they become fast friends.

“It should be pretty simple to remove,” Hannah said.
Lulu pulled her foot back and said, “Maybe we should wait for my Mommy.”
“Nonsense,” exclaimed Hannah. “I can do it!”
Lulu gritted her teeth. “OK,” the baby dinosaur said reluctantly, “but please don’t hurt me.”

Lulu takes Hannah home with her and they play along the beach while Lulu’s mom makes them some chocolate chip cookies. During Hannah’s adventure, she is able to help out her new friend with the stone between her toes, and later on is rescued by Lulu, cementing their friendship forever.

Nye crafts a good read-to-me book for young children. The illustrations are colorful and expressive, capturing the moment for the reader in a delightful way. For the most part the story flows easily and will be easily understood and appreciated by the younger set. One part which I felt could be potentially confusing is when Lulu and Hannah are playing by the lake and Hannah suggests a game of hide and seek, then they are splashing in the lake, and then playing hide and seek. I felt that the sentences may have somehow become rearranged because it would have made more sense for them to splash in the water and then for Hannah to suggest hide and seek followed by their playing of the game.

Hannah And The Magic Blanket – Land of the Dinosaurs represents the first in a series of books featuring the spunky and imaginative Hannah. Land of the Robots is currently being illustrated, so we can look forward to the release of the next adventure of Hannah and her magic blanket soon.

Do you know the picture of the little fish about to get eaten by the bigger fish, himself about to become dinner for a larger fish, and so on? Turn the fish into a variety of mutants and aliens held together by nanobots, and you have a pretty good starting point for reading Elysian Fields. Typically I try to give you a plot summary, a few quotes, and an idea of what you’re getting yourself into by reading the book I am reviewing. In this case I’m going to have to send you in without the wisdom of my council because there’s just way too much for me to try to make it make sense to you.

Consider this some appetizers then. The book is set in the post-apocalyptic future. You’re somewhere on earth at the bottom of a dried ocean blasted away by the nuclear bombs. Remnants of our earth make the occasional appearance, but any semblance to the actual earth of today is purely coincidental. The last city on earth is Elysium, and it’s a bit like Las Vegas without the subtlety. There is a huge cast of characters that tend to fight a lot for a variety of reasons.

It’s hard to really identify a hero here, there aren’t a lot of sympathetic characters. Some of my favorites include the army of dead ‘peace officers’ who have been kept on the force by having gadgets and gizmos attached to their bodies making them walk and talk and, of course, shoot. There are bluebloods who fight a never-ending death match with regenerated bodies in an effort to become Emperor. And of course, Pope Joan III who runs the Vatican level where the best nightclubs can be found.

Running through the narrative is a subtle humor, a bit like “Hitchhiker’s Guide” on testosterone. The background is invariably gloomy and dank as in this description:

He reached his homeblock as the rain began to fall, a half-hearted acid drizzle painting everything pastel and grey. His hands seemed too huge and clumsy to work the security keypad, but some antediluvian part of his brain got the job done on automatic. The door clicked open, hissing something cheerful from a busted grille, and he was home sweet somewhere.

We also get the requisite asides, small quotations from now defunct publications that explain some of the background we need to know or, as in this case, explaining something we know all too well to future generations:

Shopping Mall: A temple to the Pre-Apocalyptic God of Economics, the Shopping Mall was a form of ritualized, sanitized bazaar or marketplace, replicated across the world from glorious multi-storey edifices to so-called ‘Dirt Malls’ and ‘Mini Malls’ of lesser provenance and stature. Artificial plants, synthesized ‘muzak’ and false bonhomie were the trappings of these mighty temples of yore, where thousands of
pilgrims came to make cash offerings daily. – Professor Hiram Quigley Fosse ‘Malls of the Ancients – The Old God’

You can either read Elysian Fields or drop some acid, turn up Disturbed to 10 and watch The Matrix trilogy on fast forward. The net effect is about the same. This book is non-stop sci-fi action from the minute you get past the unnecessary prologue. Someone is constantly getting blown up, shot, incinerated, or otherwise gorily dispatched. I ended up enjoying the book because it doesn’t pretend to be anything but what it is, a sci-fi comic book that just happens to be 450+ pages long. You get your USRDA of made-up techno words, a full helping of creepy aliens, and a suitably terrifying extrapolation of where humanity will end up if we stay on our current course.

It’s not for the faint of heart, but Elysian Fields does what good Sci-Fi should, keeps you baffled but entertained from the minute you start reading until it spits you out many hours later, slightly dazed and overwhelmed. My only gripe was the ending, which seemed to be more Andy Bryenton needing to get to bed because he’d stayed up all month writing than a satisfying wrap-up to the roller coaster ride. I leave it up to you to decide if the ending is acceptable because you have to read this book, even if just to say you survived.